TXIV TUS NKAUJ NTXAWM

Written, Sung and Directed by Maiv Muas Xyooj

A heartfelt story of identity, culture, and the longing bond between a daughter and her father. This short film blends music and emotion to explore what it means to grow up between worlds — navigating disability, the American Dream, and grief. A tribute to Maiv Muas Xyooj's father, Nom Tsas Xyooj. 

Our Story

When I was in 4th grade, my father came to one of my school event. I ran away because I was ashamed of my father who had a 70-year age gap from me. I questioned why my father was the oldest out of all of my peers' parents. I carried shame for a long time with parents of old ages. When I became a teenager, exposed to the world through a more intersectional lens, I began my political and social identity development journey; which also led to a self-love journey to understanding what forgiving and advocacy can look and feel like from the experiences I endured. In 2019, I moved across the country to Massachusetts pursue my Bachelor’s Degree in Political Science and Public Policy and collegiate volleyball, and soon resided in Minnesota. I knew being away from my home, California, came with sacrifices, loneliness, and a strong spirit. Most importantly, I learned to forgive my father for giving me life at such a later time in his life, as I didn't get to experience him fully as an adult as my father. 

More about my Family's Journey:

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Resiliency lies in my parents, family, and community. Throughout my educational and professional work journey, my family was busy taking care of our aging father who was living with dementia, also known as a physical and mental disability, along with other kinds of illness. From siblings living out of town to those who lived with our father, many of us contributed through how we knew our father best while navigating our own journeys. I watched us navigated through the healthcare system, mental health, gender roles, caregiving, and anticipated grief. It’s been a little under 2 years since my father passed away. With this project, I hope to connect and be in community with youth and young people, and many others out there who also are in need of support, community, or courage during familiar challenging times as they are away from their loved ones. Most importantly, this serves as a testament to my grief and healing journey. 

This is a voice, a music video, a song, and a short film from a Hmong child of refugee and elderly parents in America. 

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Key words: 

Dementia | Mental Health | Disability | Hmong | Education | Identity